


Bad Pancake

by sophie_448



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Blind Date, M/M, Trans Character, because i'm me, because why not, just the slightest sprinkling of angst, niall is a trans girl, pretty much fluff, slight implied depression
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-05
Updated: 2016-12-05
Packaged: 2018-09-06 14:59:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,876
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8757139
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sophie_448/pseuds/sophie_448
Summary: Liam had a bad breakup, and Louis thinks a blind date is just the way to make him feel better. Louis might just be right, but Harry has some concerns. Will those crazy kids find a way to make it work? (Yes. The answer is yes.)





	

**Author's Note:**

> This fest was such a fun idea! It was a real pleasure to take part in it. Many thanks to the mods! 
> 
> This is not the fic I originally planned to write, because that ended up being a longer idea than I thought. Surprise, surprise. But I think this second idea came out okay anyway. 
> 
> Thanks as always to k8monster for their excellent help and guidance without which I might never write anything. 
> 
> As I am sliding in right under my deadline, I did not have a chance to get this brit picked. Any and all mistakes are my own.

Liam wakes up flailing, his protesting brain registering wet, cold, and confused. He sits up on the couch, wipes a hand across his eyes, and sees Louis standing in front of him with an empty glass. “What— did you just throw water in my face?” he asks. 

“Yes,” Louis says, not looking sorry at all. “This is an intervention, Liam.” 

Liam blinks, his faculties slowly returning to him. “How did you get into my flat?” And then a moment later, “Intervention for what?” 

Louis sets the glass down on the coffee table authoritatively. “It’s time to stop being sad,” he announces, ignoring the first question entirely. “Sad Liam is boring. Sam Liam stays home and sleeps on the couch on Saturday afternoon instead of getting out and doing things. All your friends, by which I mean me, would like normal Liam back.” 

"I have other friends," Liam says, frowning. 

Louis raises an eyebrow in silent challenge. It's true that most of his friends had been Alex's friends from before they were together. It's only natural that they stuck with Alex after the breakup. Still, Louis isn't his only friend. 

"I have Niall," he says, raising his chin in an expression that is definitely not a pout. "Niall would never throw water on me in my own home." 

Louis snorts. "Yeah, she would." 

Liam sighs and lets his head fall back onto the soggy sofa cushion. Yeah, she would. "Anyway, I'm not sad," he says, remembering the matter at hand. 

"Yes, you are," Louis says. "And this—" he gestures around at the piles of half empty takeout containers, stacks of dishes, and general squalor of Liam's flat—"is your sadness cave." 

And okay, Liam can admit that he's been a little lax on the cleaning front since Alex left. It just hasn't seemed that important. Still, he hadn't thought it was so obvious that he's still a bit down, even a few months down the line. 

"Well, if I am sad—and I'm not saying that I am—you can't just stop being sad when someone snaps their fingers. It doesn't work that way." 

“Sure it does,” Louis says with a slightly terrifying grin. “You just have to have the right attitude. And a plan. Fortunately for you, you have the best, best friend in the world, so I have come up with a plan for you.” 

Liam thinks about that for a minute. He winces a little as he asks, “What plan would that be?” 

Louis rocks back on his heels, looking smug. “I got you a date.” 

Liam feels his shoulders sag. “Oh, no, Louis. I’m not ready for that.” 

“If you wait until you think you’re ready, you’ll never do anything. Now, come on. Get in the shower.” 

Liam doesn’t think that’s quite right, but he can’t get his thoughts together. Louis is poking and pinching him, driving him towards the bathroom. There’s no talking to Louis when he gets like this, and Liam figures he needs a shower anyway, so he goes. 

When he gets out of the shower, Louis has laid an outfit out on the bed. He eyes the dark wash skinny jeans and the silky, mauve shirt he bought in a fit of fashion adventurousness and then never wore. He puts on the jeans and pulls a blue button-up out of his closet. When he steps out of the bedroom, Louis is sitting at the table, facing away from him. 

Without turning around, Louis says, “Put on the purple shirt, Liam.” 

“But—“ 

“No buts!” Louis says, finally turning to face him. “It looks good on you, and Harry will love it.” 

“Harry—?” 

“Your date, Liam. Try and keep up.” 

“But—“ 

Louis holds up a hand, cutting him off. “What did I say? Now, put on the shirt.” 

Liam puts on the shirt. It looks like he’s going on this date whether he likes it or not. He wishes he’d ever learned how to say no to Louis, but he’s never been able to manage it. Not when Louis suggested skiving off classes in secondary, not when he wanted to throw a massive, loud party that nearly got them evicted from the tiny flat they used to share, and apparently not now. He messes with his hair a little bit, frowning at himself in the mirror before giving up. He grabs his wallet, and then Louis is shoving him out the door. 

“Where am I going?” Liam asks belatedly as they’re standing in the hall outside his flat. 

“I texted you the address,” Louis says. Liam looks at his phone and sees the text. 

“Okay, and how will I know this Harry when I see him?” 

Louis tsks like this is trivial. “Long, curly hair, allergic to buttons. You can’t miss him.” He frog marches Liam down the stairs and into an Uber he’d apparently called at some point. And then Liam is on his way to a blind date. Apparently.

~*~

As it turns out, Liam doesn’t have any trouble finding Harry at the restaurant—mainly because Harry finds him. Seconds after walking in the door, he’s approached by a stranger with long, curly hair who takes Liam’s hand and clasps it between both of his.

“Liam,” he says, smiling, “It’s so good to meet you.” 

Liam blinks for a second, taking in a bright, floral shirt that's open about halfway down, revealing more than a few tattoos. “Uh, Harry, I’m guessing?” Harry nods. “Nice to meet you too.” 

Harry stares into Liam’s eyes for a few seconds with an unnerving intensity before he let’s go of his hand. "Our table's ready," Harry says, placing a hand on the small of Liam's back to guide him forward into the restaurant. 

"I love that shirt," Harry says as he pulls Liam's chair out for him. 

Liam flushes a bit and looks down at the purple material. Louis was right, apparently. "Thanks," he says. "I, uh, like yours too." 

Harry smiles, wide and disarming. "Thank you, Liam," he says, as though it's the best compliment he's ever been paid. 

Liam finds himself caught in Harry's really quite lovely green eyes. There's something kind of—dazzling about Harry. Liam feels kind of stupid just thinking that, but it's the word that comes to mind. He feels dangerously off balance after only a couple of minute's in Harry's company, but strangely he doesn't feel like running away. He's never quite felt like this just meeting someone before. 

Once they're settled and the server has taken their drink orders, Harry folds his arms on the table and leans forward. "So Liam, tell me about yourself," he says. He looks so eager Liam wishes he had a more exciting life to tell him about. 

"Not much to tell, I'm afraid," he says, biting his lip and feeling self-conscious. 

Harry shakes his head, his smile not wavering. "I'm sure that's not true." 

Liam shrugs and tells Harry about working as a sound engineer, mainly session work in a couple of studios and shows at a few small clubs. 

"That must be so interesting," Harry says. "My mate's a DJ, but I don't know much about it myself." 

"It can be pretty cool if the bands are good," Liam allows. 

"So how did you get into that line of work?" 

Liam presses his lips together, trying to decide how much to tell Harry. There are parts of the story that still feel like picking at a scab when they should be scars. 

Liam realizes he's been quiet for too long when Harry says, "You don't have to tell me if you don't want to. I'm just being nosy. Gemma—my sister—always says I pry too much." 

"No, no, it's fine," Liam says. "I always really liked singing, actually. My mum and dad would drive me all over the place to perform at coffee shops and parties, things like that." He looks up and Harry nods encouragingly. "Anyway, when I was 14 I went out for X-Factor. Got as far as Judges' Houses before I got sent home. Simon Cowell told me to come back in a couple of years." 

"That's amazing, Liam," Harry says. "And did you go back?" 

Liam shakes his head. "No. By the time I was 16 and could try again, I was starting to think I should be more practical. Being a pop star's not a real job. Not for people like me." 

"You must be pretty good, though, to get that far when you were so young." Harry tilts his head, looking like a confused puppy. 

Liam shrugs, dropping his eyes. "Maybe," he says. "Maybe not. Who knows why those reality TV people do anything." He draws in a deep breath and makes himself smile. "Anyway," he continues, "I decided it wasn't for me, but I still really loved music. So this seemed like a good way to keep connected to that. Did a vocational program instead of uni and ended up here." 

Harry gives him another one of those piercing stares. After a few long seconds, Liam shifts uncomfortably, wondering what exactly Harry is seeing. Then Harry grins and says, "Well, for what it's worth, I'm glad you ended up where I got to meet you." 

Liam feels the heat rising in his cheeks again. "Thanks," he says quietly.

*

When the server asks them if they're thinking about dessert, Liam realizes he's spent the entire dinner talking about himself. He didn't mean to, but Harry just keeps asking these probing questions and looking absolutely fascinated with everything Liam says. He didn't realize they'd been talking so long.

They order two tiramisus, and then Liam quickly says, "But what about you?" before Harry can ask another question and distract him. "You've just let me go on and on. I'm sorry. Tell me about yourself." 

Harry waves off his apology. "I was interested, Liam. What do you want to know?" 

"What do you do?" Liam asks, seizing on the first question that comes into his mind. 

"A bit of this, a bit of that," Harry says. "Mainly doing some club promoting right now. That's how I met Grimmy—that's my DJ friend." 

Somehow that fits him, Liam thinks. If he makes everyone feel as special as he's made Liam feel, they probably trip over themselves getting to whatever club Harry tells them about. 

Harry tells him about growing up in Cheshire and dropping out of uni when he realized he wasn't really cut out to be a lawyer. 

"I'm sure you would have been brilliant," Liam says, smiling. 

Harry shakes his head. "Nah, it's dead boring. I thought it sounded cool when I was, like, 15. Turns out it's actually a lot of work." 

Liam laughs. "Yeah, who knew?" 

Harry tries to scowl at him for a moment before giving into his own giggles. "Not me," he says, shrugging. "It's better I didn't, though. I like what I do now." 

They talk a little more before Harry pays the check, snatching it out of Liam's hand. "I asked you. It's only fair," he insists. 

"Well, Louis pushed me out the door, more like," Liam says. 

"Exactly," Harry says. 

Liam shakes his head and gives up.

*

Harry drove, so he offers Liam a ride home. Liam accepts, not wanting the evening to be over. He's going to have to thank Louis, and he'll never live it down.

When they pull up in front of Liam's building, Liam looks over at Harry, intending to say goodnight. Harry's giving him another one of those looks, his eyes intense even in the dim street light. 

Liam bites his lip and gathers up his courage. "Do you want to—do you want to come inside?" 

Harry hesitates and Liam is already regretting saying anything. Of course Harry was just being nice. Of course he isn't actually interested in Liam. 

"I'd like that," Harry says. 

Liam blinks, letting the words sink in. The relief makes him feel a little giddy. He smiles. "Great."

*

They're barely inside when Harry pushes Liam back against the wall by the door and kisses him. It should feel sudden and urgent, but it doesn't. Harry's lips are warm against his, and Liam sighs into it. Harry deepens the kiss, one hand cupping Liam's jaw. Liam rests his hands gently against Harry's waist above the band of his jeans.

Harry pulls away from Liam's mouth and trails bites and kisses down the side of Liam's neck that send little sparks of pleasure all through him. Liam makes a vaguely embarrassing sound and grips Harry tighter, pulling him forward so their bodies are pressed together shoulder to thigh. They kiss again for what feels like a long time but is probably only a couple of minutes. 

Liam is getting hard in his jeans, and he can feel the line of Harry's cock as their hips rock together. He pulls away to look at Harry. His pupils are blown wide, and his lips are kissed red. Liam is mesmerized for a moment, then he looks wildly around, suddenly remembering that his flat is a tip. Except it seems Louis had tidied up for him, a minor miracle. Liam really is never going to live this down. Liam looks back at Harry and clears his throat. "Do you want to—I, um—I have a bedroom."

"Show me," Harry says, a wolfish slant to his grin. 

Liam does.

~*~

Liam wakes to an empty bed and a rather fantastic banging coming from the kitchen. He stretches, smiling as he feels the pleasant soreness in his muscles. Then he gets up and pulls on joggers and a t-shirt before wandering into the kitchen to see what all the noise is about.

Harry has what appears to be every pot and pan Liam owns out on the counter. He's dressed in his clothes from last night, and he appears to be cooking pancakes. 

"Pancakes?" Liam says. 

Harry looks up at him, and there's something a little guarded in his eyes even though he's smiling. He nods. "I used to be a baker, you know." 

"Well, now I do," Liam says. He's pretty sure you don't need to be a baker to make pancakes, but whatever. 

Harry chatters on about working in the bakery and someone named Barbara while he finishes cooking. Liam is happy to lean against the counter and listen until Harry stacks two plates with the finished pancakes. 

They sit at Liam's little kitchen table, knees bumping because it's shoved in a corner and there's really not enough room for more than one person. They're quiet as they eat, and Liam tries to tell himself it's not awkward. 

There's a loaded silence when they both put their forks down. "I had a really nice time last night," Liam says, his voice tentative and his eyes on his empty plate. 

"Liam." He makes himself look up and meet Harry's eyes. "This is—last night was lovely." He doesn't sound happy. Liam doesn't know what to say, so he doesn't say anything. Harry sighs and runs a hand roughly through his hair. "The thing is," he says, "you just got out of a long relationship." 

Liam feels his shoulders drop. "Louis mentioned that, huh?" Harry nods. "Single now, though, aren't I?" Liam tries, starting to feel a little pathetic. 

"The thing is—" Harry starts, then shakes his head and tries again. "Okay, so, pancakes," he says. 

"Pancakes?" Liam says, not following the change of subject. 

"Yeah, pancakes," Harry says. "When you make them, the first one's always a mess innit? You have to throw it out." 

"So?" 

"So I don't want to be your bad pancake, Liam. I really like you. I don't want to start something and have you regret it because it's your first time dating after a bad breakup." 

Liam is pretty sure there's a flaw in that argument somewhere, but he thinks it's time to salvage what's left of his dignity. It's obvious Harry is trying to let him down easy. "Okay, if that's what you want," he says, trying to keep his voice flat.

Harry breathes out, looking relieved. "It's for the best," he says. He stands up from his chair and then leans back down to press a kiss against Liam's lips. It's over before Liam can react. "See you around, Liam." He squeezes Liam's shoulder once, and then he's gone. Liam sits there at the table for a long time.

~*~

"Well that's just stupid."

Liam stares at Niall. She's perched on the arm of the big, lumpy chair in her living room while Liam is curled into himself on the couch. He's just spent half an hour telling her about the Harry situation. Well, more like crying at her about it, but nobody needs to know about that. "I'm sorry?" 

"Total bollocks," Niall clarifies. "First of all, relationships aren't breakfast foods." She stops and waits for Liam to confirm his understanding before she continues. He nods, totally lost. She bats her long blonde hair back over her shoulder in an annoyed sort of way. "All metaphors for relationships break down if you push them too hard, but that's and especially flimsy one." 

"Right," Liam says, trying to act like he gets where she's going with this. "But that doesn't really change anything does it?" 

Niall shrugs. "Not as such, but also arbitrary relationship rules are stupid. There's no set time that it takes someone to get over a breakup. There's no magic age when you have to find 'the one' or be alone forever. People are different. Relationships are different. You have to do your best to figure out what's right for you." 

Liam nods several times, letting those pieces arrange in his head. It makes a lot of sense. But. "But what if he's right? What if I end up regretting it?" 

"You might," Niall allows. "Still a bollocks reason not to do something." 

Liam must not look convinced, because Niall shakes her head and jumps down from her perch and tucks herself in next to Liam on the couch. "So like, you know when I decided to transition?" she asks. 

"Yeah," Liam says. That was before he met her, but she's talked about it a few times before. 

"Right, so there were plenty of people who wanted me to wait or didn't want me to do it at all. A lot of people were like, 'what if you regret it afterwards?' And I was pretty sure I wouldn't, but I couldn't know 100% until I actually did it. But you know what I did know for absolutely sure?" 

"What?"

"I definitely would have regretted it if I _didn't_ do it." 

"I see what you're saying," Liam says. "But that's like—your true self or something, right? Isn't that kind of different?" 

Niall rolls her eyes. "Different situation, same concept. You can regret not doing something just as much as doing something. You can't know for sure until you do it, so you've gotta go with your gut."

Liam thinks about that for a minute. "Yeah," he says finally. "I guess you're right." 

"Of course I'm right," Niall says. "Now, what's your gut telling you?" 

"That I really like him, and I wish he'd give it a chance," Liam says quietly. 

Niall nods. "Exactly." 

Liam leans over and hugs her hard. "Thanks," he says into her hair. 

She squeezes him tight for a second then lets him go. "What are friends for?" she replies. She gives him a playful little shove in the direction of the door. "Now get out of here. I've got shit to do."

~*~

Liam knocks on the door, trying to keep his hand from shaking. After a minute he hears footsteps from inside, and Harry opens the door.

"Liam," he says, looking surprised. Which is fair, since Liam is showing up at his home unannounced. 

"Louis gave me your address," he says apologetically. 

Harry nods. When Liam doesn't go on, he asks, "Did you need something?"

"I just—have something that I want to say?" The end of his sentence rises in tone, making it sound like a question. He winces. 

"Sure, okay," Harry says. "Why don't you come in?" 

Liam moves past him as he holds the door open. They stand in the middle of the entryway just kind of staring at each other for a few moments. 

"So what did you want to say?" Harry prompts him again. 

Liam takes a deep breath, and then he takes another. Finally, he makes himself speak. "Relationships aren't pancakes." 

Harry looks stricken and opens his mouth to speak, but Liam holds up a hand. "No, please just let me get this out, okay?" 

Harry closes his mouth and waits. 

"Relationships aren't pancakes," Liam says again. "And there aren't any rules that will magically make a relationship work or fall apart. I did break up with someone a few months ago, and we were together a long time. But that doesn't mean my next relationship is doomed to fail. I think if you find the right person, you make it work. And maybe it won't work out, and maybe we will regret it. I can't tell the future. But I know for sure that I'd regret it if I didn't at least try. So—here I am. Trying." Liam spreads his hands out from his sides. "I don't know you very well yet, but I like you a lot. If you don't like me, that's okay. Just tell me that. But if you don't want to go out with me just because of some story about pancakes, then please. Give it a chance. Give me a chance." 

Liam lets out a breath, feeling winded. "Okay," he says. "I'm done now." 

Harry keeps looking at him and doesn't say anything. 

"Um," Liam says after a few awkward moments. "Okay, well, I'll just—" He starts to gesture towards the door, but Harry stops him, wrapping his hands around Liam's upper arms and kissing him. 

Liam is so surprised he doesn't react for a few seconds. Then his brain catches up to what's happening, and he kisses Harry back. It's only been a couple of days, and they only did this once, but he's missed it. 

After a minute or two Harry pulls back to meet Liam's eyes. "Okay. I'll be your bad pancake, Liam." 

Liam laughs. "No, you'll be a great pancake. The best. After all, you used to be a baker." He widens his eyes at Harry, going for innocent. 

Harry shakes his head, trying to look offended, but he can't keep the smile off his face. "I did used to be a baker," he says. "And don't you forget it." 

Liam smiles and kisses him again.

~*~

"You were right about everything," Liam says.

"Of course I was," Louis says distractedly, not looking away from playing FIFA. "What specifically was I right about?" 

"Me and Harry." 

Louis tosses the controller away from him and spins around. "I knew it!" he crows. "Say it again. I wasn't paying attention." 

Liam sighs, feeling incredibly fond. "You were right, Lou. Treasure this moment, because I'm never saying it again." 

Louis just shakes his head knowingly, then tackles Liam with his rather violent version of a hug.

**Author's Note:**

> [tumblr](http://ifshehadwings.tumblr.com/)


End file.
